In this video, from the February 1, 2022 Community Practice Call, John describes how to meet a moment of closure, upset, or argument in your relationship with a spacious heart and infinite consciousness. He also teaches a practice for experiencing embodied spaciousness in the face of a difficult moment based on the Tibetan Buddist meditation, Tonglen.

You'll learn:
- Spaciousness is meant to be brought into relationship—it allows us to be in full acceptance of our partners
- Almost all arguments are security-driven, pattern-driven, or ego-driven and we fall into the patterning of our childhoods
- Spaciousness is the process of unwinding your childhood programming
- Relationship is almost never about "finding someone who will meet you" —that belief often gets used as an excuse to not accept, approve, or allow your partner's process
- The most relaxed state we can achieve comes from relaxing as infinite consciousness or infinite love
- It's almost impossible to be stingy with our partners when we're resting as infinite consciousness or infinite love
- The capacity to bring a specious heart or a rested spacious consciousness to the moments in your relationships that have resulted in closure are the keys to allowing a new pattern to emerge
- We all tend to drift towards fight, flight, or freeze, but relaxation in those moments unwinds your patterns
- The capacity to wrap, accept or love is infinite
- The practice of bringing grounded consciousness and love allows you to embody the Masculine pole to evoke a polarized moment
- Tantric practice moves from feeling conscious love felt fully in your body into a transmission through your body - it's a yogic and meditative practice
- If someone's nervous system is in a trauma state and we are making them less important than our expression (i.e. anger), at best, it's not loving them in the moment and, at worst, it's abuse
- Whoever is more aware in any moment is in the Masculine
- If you soften open and reveal the truth of your heart while also stroking your partner's heart or grounding their body, you are tending to their nervous system
- We have to work with our wounds/trauma in therapy so we can bring our truth in the moment without history
- Doing a cleanse from relationship can be a good opportunity to reflect on what's true for you and fully honor yourself
- In order to fully honor your desires, tend to the truth of your heart first, create a temple of your core desires, and then live as an expression of those desires. Then, rather than strategize who your next partner will be, see who is magnetized into your life as a result of you living in alignment with your core desires.
- Explore "Why would you want to be in relationship at all? Focus on your core desires and explore if a potential partner aligns with those.
- The Masculine in all of us craves freedom; the Feminine in all of us craves love
- The More masculine you are, the more you will crave freedom; any relationship you will succeed in has to create space for that

Resources from this call:

Blog - What is a Feminine Cleanse?
https://www.johnwineland.com/blog/2020/5/15/what-is-a-feminine-cleanse?rq=masculine%20cleanse

Practice Music - "The Blessing" by Essie Jain